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Davey (Security Man!) Like action man only a lot slower

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Davey (Security Man!) Like action man only a lot slower

Postby munchingfoo on Mon Oct 11, 2004 11:34 am

Is there any chance we can all get some kind of petition together to get davey to stop being such a tool.

I understand that music isn't allowed to be played after 11PM. I don't agree with it, but I guess it's fair but Davey takes the fucking piss.

Who the hell does he think he is shining a torch through my window telling me to turn my music down at 10.30 on a friday night. If someone has complained about the music then fair enough, I don't want to be a nusience neighbour or anything but if no-one has complained then he can go fuck himself.

That is the first question I ask him aswell. Has anyone complained?

Answer, always no. Then fuck of back to your little hole and watch TV then.

He really is out of order. It's about time he stopped hastling us to make good his boring little existence.

Can the committee maybe speak to the management about him or something. It's not like I want the rules changed or anything I just want him to know what they are.

P.S. If anyone thinks this is a little heated I turn your attention here.

http://www.thesinner.net/messageboard-v ... read=11888
I'm not a large water-dwelling mammal Where did you get that preposterous hypothesis? Did Steve
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Re:

Postby Steveo on Mon Oct 11, 2004 12:31 pm

Last year when I was in DRA, before the old lot got demolished I was going to do laundry.

Davey --- "Where are you going?"
Me --- "To do my laundry" (had a big basket of clothes)
Davey --- "Can I see you matric card?"
Me --- "I don't have it on me"
Davey --- "Well I can't let you go to the laundry"
Me --- "Why?"
Davey --- "You might not be a student"

WTF?!?!?

I went and got the card and did my laundry, but whats worse is that he carded me again later that night while watching TV in the common room with some friends wating for my washing to finish.

He needs to be put out to pasture.

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Re:

Postby Haunted on Mon Oct 11, 2004 1:24 pm

Heres a dialogue I had with him last week

ME (taking chain off my bike
Davey: What you doing sonny?
ME: Taking my bike out for a ride into town
Davey: This is your bike is it?
Me: Yes this is my bike
Davey: Is that so?
Me: ....yes....
Davey (stares in silence as he watche me take the chain off and cycle away, still staring when i look back50ft later)


Retire him for ever
Genesis 19:4-8
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Re:

Postby Rennie on Mon Oct 11, 2004 2:22 pm

Davey is here to stay sadly. We'd miss him if he went - you know we would! If he gets annoying, just tell him you'll report his behavious to Securitay = the phone number's on his door. That should stop him pestering.

However, on the music front, I'm not sure but I think music can be played until midnight - check in the little booklet that was in your room at the start of the year (mine is now on a landfill site somewhere).

:)
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Re:

Postby Rennie on Mon Oct 11, 2004 2:26 pm

Oh, and I'll have to add a conversation with him:

Me: (gets out of my car, and locks it)
Davey: Alright sonny, is that your car?
Me: Yes Dave, you've seen me drive it for about a year now
Davey: Where did you get a car from?
Me: Some guy was selling it dave
Davey: So it's definately yours then?
Me: Yes
Davey: Are you parking it there?
(in a car parking space, next to my house...)
Me: Yes Dave, I'm going in now.
Davey: Can I see your matric card?
Me: Why?
Davey: I just need to see it.
Me: No (goes in my house, and locks the door)

I walk into the kitchen to find dave shining his torch through the window at me.

Me: Dave, what are you doing
Davey: Nothing sonny (carries on staring until I leave the kitchen - god knows how long he was there for)

A classic...
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Re:

Postby Rennie on Mon Oct 11, 2004 2:27 pm

Oh, and I forgot to add - the poor bastard is on the equivalent of £4.00 an hour as he has to buy his uniform, equipment and petrol.
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Re:

Postby Alex Muir on Mon Oct 11, 2004 9:29 pm

Does anyone remember the good old days when he used to sit in the DRH TV room watching trout fishing all night long?

He couldn't make it to the top floor of any of the blocks. If you rang him to a top-floor room, he'd just stand outside and shine his torch in through your window.
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Re:

Postby Steveo on Mon Oct 11, 2004 9:48 pm

[s]Alex Muir wrote on 23:29, 11th Oct 2004:
He couldn't make it to the top floor of any of the blocks. If you rang him to a top-floor room, he'd just stand outside and shine his torch in through your window.


That was painful to watch when I got locked out last year on the 3rd floor at DRA.

[hr]
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Re:

Postby Mohawk on Sun Oct 17, 2004 11:20 pm

i take great pleasure out of zooming past Davey on my bike at half 2/3 in the morning when returning from the Union, quite satisfying...
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Re:

Postby Guest on Mon Oct 18, 2004 6:42 pm

Why doesnt the committee of Fife Park and DRA get together and buy him sky so he can sit in his hut for the year? it would only be about £20/month a reasonable expense for hassle free parties?
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Re:

Postby Mohawk on Mon Oct 18, 2004 8:20 pm

according to someone who did night security whilst davey was in hospital over the summer he cannot tell you to turn music down, the RA must do that,


he can ask you for your matric card, but he msut not shine his torch through windows,


if he does you can report him to Securitay!
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Re:

Postby Rectalprobe on Tue Oct 19, 2004 12:55 pm

[s]Unregisted User wrote on 17:56, 18th Oct 2004:
Why doesnt the committee of Fife Park and DRA get together and buy him sky so he can sit in his hut for the year? it would only be about £20/month a reasonable expense for hassle free parties?


Why dont the comitee get together and get a better bloody security guard!! The only time he'd move fast is if he heard the ice cream van or if someone stole his doughnut!!!!
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Re:

Postby Fionnlagh on Tue Oct 19, 2004 2:32 pm

This guy sounds amazing. Perhaps the DRA and fife park committees should band together to offer "Davey Safaris", a never to be forgotton look at this curious animal in his natural habitat!
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Re:

Postby Mohawk on Thu Oct 21, 2004 1:39 am

lets hope he trips and falls in the balancer pond one night
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Three Cheers for Dave

Postby Guest on Thu Oct 21, 2004 5:20 pm

Well, he is amazing and I don't think it's very fair that everyone's criticising him. You've just got to join in with his sense of humour. Offer him some tea once in a while, allow him to bend your ear about his toilet habits, induldge him by allowing complete matric card examination. He's a long established part of David Russell and stands pride of place along with dear Maureen and Sarah. Three cheers for Dave! The man of the hour!

P.S: Why's he called Porn Dave again?
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Re:

Postby hoopy froodette on Sat Oct 23, 2004 5:13 pm

'Dear Maureen and Sarah'? Errr, riiiight...

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Disco Diva Dave

Postby Guest on Tue Oct 26, 2004 9:16 pm

He is annoying, wierd and strange.
Is he the DRA Ninja-instead of shining his torch he would hold an oriental lantern up at yout window?
Why does he never come out in the rain? Lazy so and so!
Maybe we should take up his evenings by sending him on a weight-wachers course-then he would be at all the meetings, instead of bugging us! Oh no then he would be able to catch us better!

He is not actually allowed inside the buildings you know!
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Re:

Postby tintin on Fri Oct 29, 2004 4:03 pm

Leave Dave alone - he is a decent chap who has to put up with a lot of stick from drunken tw*ts. He has been through a lot in his time and is doing well for himself now. "Rules is rules" and he has to enforce them. He is paid a pittance for what he does (trust me, he told me how much) but goes about it with a genuine good humour.
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Re:

Postby hoo m i on Sun Oct 31, 2004 5:23 pm

yeah, he's quite annoying sometimes, I was so mad when he treated me like somekind of convict when I was going to do my laundry or play the piano.

But, when he's not acting like action man he's quite nice. I guess everyone do not really hate him that much, but just using the message board to 'release anger' caused by Davey...

fortunately he doesn't use the internet, he won't know all these criticisms and won't feel bad.
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Re:

Postby mylittlepony on Wed Nov 03, 2004 7:01 pm

security dave is hilarious
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