by Manic23 on Sun Feb 15, 2004 1:40 pm
Hello Mr Chef of St Regulus halls, you don't know me, I am one of the many faces that wanders in and out of the canteen twice a day, so full of hope and dreams that we might actually get something nice to eat, and each and every time you shatter my poor already broken heart.
Normally I just sit and shovel what slurry you slop onto my plate into my mouth and close my eyes and think happy thoughts to try and get me through what is becoming an ordeal on a daily basis, but I confess Mr Chef, Its a battle I'm losing quite rapidly. I finally broke today when instead of eating the "Roast lamb" that the menu board promised, I tucked into what I can only assume was the Lambs Arse: I've never seen so much grisle on such a small portion of meat, and by the time I'd separated the "Meat" from the congealed lard I'd about the amount it would take to make an anorexic field mouse. now i wander back to my room disillusioned wondering what is the point of living. I now drink about 7-8 litres of water a day just so I don't feel hungry.
Now before I get irate people telling me that nobody is forcing me to go to the canteen, that's not the case: we pay good money to have catered accomodation, so why should we have to eat the shite that we do? I was told on good information that it costs regs 11 pence a day to feed a student in our halls! 11 pence! Jesus.
Let us just analyse what fantastic meals we've had so far:
1)Hunk o' Bread with chicken drumsticks
2)Chicken "Pie" (forgive me if i'm wrong, but isn't the chicken meant to be on the inside, as opposed to chicken slop with empty pastry on top)
3)Baked potato (Nuff Said)
4)"Chipsteak" (reformed cow anus)
I could go on, but I'm just depressing myself more.
On the plus side, keep up the turkey dinosaurs and smily face potatoes, they're the most nuitricous and satsfying things you serve.
So please Mr Chef, Make it end before I go mental and am forced to kill and eat that fat ginger cat that has been hanging about the annexe.
P.S. Im honestly not just trying to be a smart-arse; the state of our food is godawfully depressing