I'm not usually one for talking about matters of the heart, so forgive me for filling this thread with blancmangey rubbish!! I'm not so much looking for advice, just reassurance or clarification on an issue:
I broke up with my other half four weeks ago. I instigated the actual "let's end it" conversation, but it was he who was doing the whole silent treatment for the few days leading up to it and claimed he was contemplating our future and whether we would ever get to live near to each other (we were conducting the relationship with a distance of about 150 miles at the time). I was partly annoyed and upset that he was choosing to be off and quiet instead of talking to me, and also weighing up the chances of me ever moving back home again to live, which is where he is still based. The long and short of it was that I said we shouldn't prolong the inevitable and just end it now, rather than in a few months when I could have found out I'd be living even farther away.
Anyway, the next day he contacted me and asked if I was still certain. I said yes and stuck by my gut instinct. In the week that followed I "fooled around" with a friend one night (partly as a "recovery" mechanism to get over my ex, if that makes any sense) and it hit home just now much I would miss him and I severely doubted my decision. I contacted him the next day to say I was having second thoughts and that I wanted to give it a second chance, but he wasn't open to talking or discussing the idea. The next few days he would text me every so often to ask what I was upto. I told him I'd rather not have a "chatty" relationship for a while because it was still too soon, and that neither of us would get over it if we kept in touh so frequently.
The following week he text me again, and in my nostalgic mood I debated with him again the idea of us getting back together. He still didn't want to know and was adamant he didn't want to. I suggested we just break contact for a while. That weekend he phoned me drunk and said he wanted to get back with me. When he later found out I had been out that night and pulled a friend he ignored me and didn't want to know. I tried reasoning with him by saying that we had been broken up for over a fortnight and that he had made it clear on several occasions that us getting back wasn't an option. In addition, I also pointed out to him that the first time we had gone out together, almost three years ago, he had cheated on me with his ex and ended the relationship to move in with him - the reasoning being that I had technically done nothing wrong because we were both single.
He ignored me for a few days, until the end of the following week he (claims) soberly phoned me saying he had thought long and hard about it and wanted to give us another go. It was fine for a day, but then he started getting all quiet and "off" again. When I probed further he said it was going to take him time to get used to the idea of us going out again, knowing that I had been with someone else in the meantime. Fair enough I thought... but he then ignored all my calls and texts. Two days later he text me to say he was sorry for messing me around but he couldn't make it work. End of the whole saga I would have hoped.
A couple of weeks ago, after the initial break up, I contacted a mutual friend of ours from back home, to whom my ex has lately become very close, but who has also been a good friend of mine for a couple of years. He ignored my text and I didn't hear anything back at all. I contacted him again today and had a very curt "my phone's playing up" text back from him, followed by one sentence replies to questions I asked when trying to make conversation. When I said I was getting the hint that he didn't want to talk to me he said "good". And when I said I was surprised he would take sides over the break up issue he replied that "it wasn't a hard side to choose!"
Now I assume that part of his unpleasantness is due to the fact that I made it known to my ex in the past that I was envious of their friendship and was sometimes a bit peeved off that they would often stay over together at each others' houses even though they only live a few streets away. This was further heightened by the fact that my ex's mum didn't want me, the partner, to stay over, but would let the friend stay no problem. My ex always dismissed any worries I had and once even told me not to mention it again.
Now that I have seemingly lost two people who were, if nothing else, good friends, does it seem from the above as if I was out of line or just unlucky?