Boys at the Bop

[Senethro]

Has to be said, there are plenty of strip clubs where the girls are less likely to get groped than in tha bop.

[Abserdman]

Has to be said, there are plenty of strip clubs where the girls are less likely to get groped than in tha bop.

Yeah, because if you grope the girls in a strip club you really do get thrown out on your arse!

[Duggeh]

Do you mean that for the last 4 years I've had the oppertunity for a free open and safe grope and haven't taken it?

Hurrah for me.

[Unreg Bob]

There's nothing funny about what you said. And that is why I wrote "trying to be funny". I thought perhaps that you were posting such utter rubbish in a vain attempt at humour. The fact that you were being serious is sad. And worrying.

Do you know how to conduct any sort of debate?! It is absolutely pathetic that I have to come on here again to try and establish what the problem was with my comments...

So exactly what part of what I was saying was "utter rubbish" or "trying to be funny". In what way do you disagree with it and what are your own opinions on the matter as a consequence of my suggestions?

If a boy needs to grab a girl inappropriately to initiate a "relationship" than i doubt it is a relationship he is after.

I don’t know any statistics in St. Andrews (because it is a rather obscure bubble town with non-standard students - in comparison to the rest of Scotland), but I think you will find many relationships are formed by groping or more rather the end result of random sex or phone number obtaining as a consequence of groping. Might I add here the grope/grab generally leads on to close/sexual dancing for substantial time if it is appreciated.

i know plenty of girls who will happily make the first move if they are interested in the guy...

Do they make this move on someone they have just met, completely randomly and unconnected by any series of friends? Do they do this at a nightclub or the Bop? Or are you referring to someone they know and have become interested in over time? I know girls do sometimes make the first move on randoms in clubs but it’s not very often done by the types you find in St. Andrews.

maybe that is why you have so much trouble with my "entire sex". Given your post, it doesn't shock me that you have problems getting girls.

i would go as far as to say guys like you are the problem here.

When did this argument get so personal? You have no idea what sort of character I am because I made no suggestion about the way I act. I have no problem with 'getting' girls - I do not grope girls because I do not have to. I can on the other hand completely understand why such things go on and it frustrates me that such a one sided thread can exist on this board and I am forced to post.

[Al]

A debate? There's nothing to debate. Debate suggests some room for argument or an acceptance that there be some validity in the other viewpoint. None of that is possible on this topic. Anyone who thinks sexual assault is OK is beyond the pale.

[Senethro]

you're kind of a jerk unreg bob :/

[Jono]

Do you mean that for the last 4 years I've had the oppertunity for a free open and safe grope and haven't taken it?

Hurrah for me.

For shame! You must be some kind of gentleman.

[Unreg Bob]

A debate? There's nothing to debate. Debate suggests some room for argument or an acceptance that there be some validity in the other viewpoint. None of that is possible on this topic.

If you disagree with what I said so much surely you are motivated to change my opinions? I'm clearly a rational person who has taken on board everything said in response to me and then replied with a counter-argument.

Anyone who thinks sexual assault is OK is beyond the pale.

Since when has physical contact become sexual assault? Do we now have to stand next to a female until she gives us a written statement that she would like to initiate physical contact in slowly increasing scale of intimacy? Bullshit...it is acceptable to initiate some sort of contact because otherwise it will always be unknown whether or not it was wanted.

you're kind of a jerk unreg bob :/

I'm clearly going to lose sleep tonight because you threw some random insult that a 13 year old American would use at me.

[Senethro]

unreg bob you don't sound like a very nice person

[Al]

UnregBob, while 'groping' can mean any sort of sexual touching, it is clear from the context of the first post that for the purposes of this thread 'groping' was being used in the sense of unwanted touching. That is sexual assault.

And, for the record, you haven't countered anyone's argument. Because there is no counter to it.

[Guest]

Hey folks, just so you know I work as doorstaff at the union, and we are all sick and tired of the groping too. The problem, as many others have pointed out, is that the bop is dark, smoky, and fully of bodys; in short, we cannot see small actions like groping. Fights we can deal with, but this sort of behaviour is virtually impossible to notice unless we happen to be looking right at the offender at the time.

That said, we can and do watch people we know to be 'pests' very closely, and where possible remove them from the premesis and refer them to the SRC for banning. So, an appleal: if you see anyone touching other members innapropriately, or you yourself are touched, PLEASE come and tell us. We will watch the person very closely, and if we notice any further innapopriate behaviour they will be removed and reported. Also, if multiple people report someobody we will again take action against the offender. Please remember though that we have to be fair to everbody, so we can't throw them out immediately - we do need some proof!

Finally, if you're as pissed off as we are, then next time you are groped and the person who does it is removed, stick around and give us your details. If we can get witnesses, it makes it much easeir for us to take more serious action against people.

[James.C.]

there is a guy who i only noticed towards the end of the semester but on two seperate nights he was being innapropriate with my friends and it was unwelcome as well. Quite sure hes a 4th year either geog or geoscience student as i see him in the it lab all the time. If i see him again i would be happy to point him out if he does anything.

[Anon.]

if you see anyone touching other members innapropriately

arf

[Guester M]

There is nothing like groping a blokes arse in the bop! It's bloody hilarious.

Some friends of mine at the start of this semester made a point of doing it. And it was all a group of lads (straight and gay). It was pish funny to see some bloke nearly shitting himself because some person, a bloke, felt his arse or crotch (there were more points for a crotch grope). When it did get serious is when the straight ones groped the bloke and he responded in kind, funny as hell, but alas...the gay guys in the group were loving the all round hilarity which ensued most tuesdays and fridays.

So get a grip people. It's only a grope. In other places that i have been too, i would settle for a grope in the bop over being glassed in a bar, which unfortunately nearly happened to me before.

And re door staff. If someone accused me of groping someone, and i didnt grope them, it was accidental, i would be totally furious. So i agree with the bloke above who said that the door staff should not be allowed to throw someone out of the bop for groping/accidental gropage. I'm sure some little bitch would take the piss wiht it eventually.

Moral of the story is: its a grope. chill out. it could be worse.

[James.C.]

There is nothing like groping a blokes arse in the bop! It's bloody hilarious.

See now if you did it to me, i wouldn't mind, i would find it funny but some girls just plain find it inappropriate and i can see why.

[Hennessy]

In my opinion it's a lot of fuss about something we can't do much about. As previously mentioned if you enter a room drunk with a couple of hundred other drunk people flailing their limbs about then you're going to get touched. While those who do this on purpose are bastards what about those who didn't mean it at the time? We've all been in situations where we've inadvertently brushed up against someone, even if you know it was an honest mistake who's to say the other person didn't think you were making a pass at them?

As for policing it, let's get back to Planet Earth shall we? Or more specifically a dark and crowded bop with music blaring and lights flashing. I can see innumerable problems both with locating offenders and ensuring that you don't get jealous or angry drunk girls making up little stories to get men they don't like ejected. In fact I'd go so far as to say it's impossible, and anyway security wading into a crowd of half cut revellers to extract someone who might even be innocent just screams "potential riot" inside the bop, where people could get hurt.

[Guest]

For a start, it is a criminal offence to engage in unwanted conduct that causes offense to someone. Secondly, and in my view much more importantly, everybody has the right to enjoy their night out. Nobody should have to worry that they will be humiliated or threatened by randy guys sexually harrassing them. I can understand how people might not see a problem with it, but I hope that we are all adult enough to respect the fact that different people have different boundaires. At the end of the day, that cheeky grope could ruin somebodys night - I don't think anyone here would really want that.
By all means grope your girflriend / boyfriend / life partner / farmyard animal to your hearts content, but I don't think its really fair on people to just go up to them and grab hold of the first thing you find - have some taste!

[Jono]

I got my arse pinched at rocksoc. She made me feel like a piece of meat... A worthless, Herculean piece of meat!

Jokes aside, Door-staff person is right. feeling up randoms isn't exactly the mark of civility; or anything else for that matter. Think of it like a museum. Look, but don't touch, unless the voices tell you otherwise (That's the voice(s )of the individual, not the voices in your head obviously).

As for punishing the innocent; the Union is a democracy, but the security is the dictatorship arm (albeit with an appeals process). Leave off the human rights rubbish and do as you're jolly well told!

[Delts]

I have many times been abused in the bop, and by a member of staff no less. He viciously attacks my delicate ass with ferocious slaps. I really should stop going on stage when Spike is there...

[Abserdman]

I have many times been abused in the bop, and by a member of staff no less. He viciously attacks my delicate ass with ferocious slaps. I really should stop going on stage when Spike is there...

You're lucky. I get it without ever going on stage.

*calls to have Spike banned from the Bop!*