Modern Manners/etiquette

[careba2010]

After a week of nights out where people sat and played on their phones instead of talking to each other, I was wondering if anyone else feels that this is bad manners.

Basically we were in the pub and everyone apart from me was busy texting people and ringing people who werent there. I am sorry but this smacks me as really rude, when you go out with someone you obviously want to spend time with them so then why spend all night playing on your phone? Its basically the phone user saying to whoever they are out with "You mean actually nothing to me and I would much rather play on my phone than talk to you". Another annoying thing is those people that sit with their phone on the table just incase someone else texts/rings them when your out for coffee- KEEP THE BLOODY THING IN YOUR BAG/POCKET BECAUSE WHATEVER IT IS WILL SURELY WAIT TWENTY MINUTES OR SO.

I know thats a bit of a rant but it really gets on my nerve, I am addicted to my phone as much as the next person so the irony of me complaining about their use is not wasted on me. But I just wanted to guage what the popular opinion was and whether I am alone in thinking that this is bad manners?

[Cain]

I'll have my phone out if I'm expecting to hear from somebody, like if there's a group of 5 of us meant to be out, but the fifth one is running late or lost. Otherwise, it's just super-rude.

[Power Metal Dom]

I am inclined to agree with the OP and I certainly think the same way if someone in my company is using their phone excessively. It does imply that the person(s) they're contacting are their desired companion(s) and not yourself.

But I'm guilty of sending the odd text or receiving a phone call when out with mates, but generally that's excusable if it's plans to meet up with those same people later on with the group you're with now.

Maybe it's shyness? When there's a lull in conversation perhaps it's sort of a social reflex to look busy?

[What?]

I keep my phone on the table because it seems to lose signal in my pocket. And I tend to go for long drinking sessions in the pub if I go, and am usually with some folk who are waiting for the rest of a group to show up.

But I agree about constant use being rude. It is.

[careba2010]

Glad I am not alone. I know there is reasons as mentioned where it is necessary but it is the incessent use of them. The irony is that these seem people who seem to not be able to leave their phone for 30 seconds are also the worst when it comes to replying to text messages!

[starsandsparkles]

I wish people would leave the room/table if they have to answer their phones. It's so disruptive to other people who are trying to continue their conversations.

People on the phone for ages on trains annoy me; "oh, sorry, I keep losing signal... hello? hello? oh hi... im just about to go into another tunnell...hello? hi?..yeh, so..hi?" What is the point?

Whilst working as a customer service assistant in a call centre I had quite a few people give me orders whilst they were on the train, which is fine, except that they were shouting their personal details (including credit card details) to the whole carriage. Genius!

[RandomMusings]

Brings me back to the whole 'phones in the library' stuff from the other day.

[irish200]

Your conversation must be incredibly dull for people to be on the phone to other people or even going so far as to leave their phone out in the hope of escape.

[The Dude]

Why don't you find a pub with poor recpetion like the cellar or ma bells? That way people can't hope to accept calls or make any. Being a smoker it is easy to get around this situation. When I pop out for a fag I get all of my talking and texting done in the time it takes me to smoke. I can then return to the table and stay pleasently engaged with the conversation.

[Haunted]

The irony is that these seem people who seem to not be able to leave their phone for 30 seconds are also the worst when it comes to replying to text messages!

Is that only to your text messages? Given that they already ignore you when out at the pub, ignoring text messages would be consistent with their behaviour.

[Duggeh]

Why don't you find a pub with poor recpetion like the cellar or ma bells? That way people can't hope to accept calls or make any. Being a smoker it is easy to get around this situation. When I pop out for a fag I get all of my talking and texting done in the time it takes me to smoke. I can then return to the table and stay pleasently engaged with the conversation.

You are a cunning bar steward sir.

[the Empress]

It definately is rude! Usually I'll only have my phone out if I'm expected a call related to jobs . . . most baffling though is that my local train station actually has to have a sign out asking people not to take calls while at the service windows. I had a customer on the phone while I was putting their stuff through the tills; it's exasperating and slows down the whole process.

[Hennessy]

I don't like it either, but if I get a text I'm going to answer it. Luckily I have these carcinogenic leaves which I stuff into thin paper and ignite, which allows me to leave conversations and go outside when the burning misanthropic tendencies are too well indulged by the rudeness of others.

What will it be like in thirty years time, when presumably something even smaller and more diverse than the cellular telephone is invented? People's eyes glazing over as they take a call or texts and pictures being fed into the brain stem directly? We are living in a golden age of politeness until then, I suppose.

[Haunted]

Presumably we could communicate much faster that way, even to people across the table. It may be considered polite (or may be taboo) to just talk to someone by then.

[Dempsey]

...

Luckily I have these carcinogenic leaves which I stuff into thin paper and ignite, which allows me to leave conversations and go outside ...

And thank you for confirming my hopeless state of addiction as this sentence prompts my right hand to, seemingly of its own accord, reach for the pack.

My phone tends to demand a lot of attention from me, but I still rarely answer a text or fiddle about unnecessarily during a conversation; even one in which I am not entirely engaged. At most, I check to see if it's urgent or not and respond while multitasking my way into a casket.