Dating Dos and Don'ts

[James]

Do compliment her on her trouser suit, but only if she's wearing a trouser suit: at no time give her any indication that you've already been through her wardrobe.

Don't dress as an admiral in the Japanese Navy, even if you are one, as this is far too formal.

Geeks: Don't say, "Your eyes, to me, hold all the intricate depth and mysterious beauty of the new Intel Pentium 4 Processor."

Don't phone her during the first date: that's just too keen.

Don't let her know you're a Chuckle Brother.

Don't take her on a tour of the Yacult factory on your first date ... she might not be as interested in the manufacture of Yacult as you are.

Girls: don't wave a semaphore flag at him, or flash a lamp in his face saying "M'aidez! M'aidez!" - you're just giving out confusing signals.

Don't wear a balloclava.

Don't show her videos of fights with your previous girlfriends. If you do, don't tell her to "Shut Up!" when a good bit's coming up.

Do be cool and suave after the first date, don't phone her straight away ... leave it about two years.

Don't say, "Do you know what 'Tromboning' is?"



Thanks to "The 99p Challenge" (Radio 4) for that. Any others?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/comedy.shtml?ninetynine#

[s](Too much time on my hands.)[/s]

[quarterstaff]

[s]James wrote on 14:44, 28th Aug 2004:

Do be cool and suave after the first date, don't phone her straight away ... leave it about two years.





[s](Too much time on my hands.)[/s]




excellent.

[Humphrey]

Don't wait almost a week to call her, then upon ringing her, admit that you cant remember anything about her or the night you got together. Don't then make her sit up in your sitting room until the early hours of the morning, watching Weirs Way and late night Trisha whilst constantly asking her questions like 'why are you still here?' and 'shouldnt you be going home now'. Oh yeah dont talk about yourself the whole time and wistfully refer to ex's in conversation. Do not introduce her to your mates who can regail her with embaressing stories about the time you got drunk on Absinth and did rather unpleasant things. Dont get so drunk you forget her name. I think thats about it.

[hr]http://www.livejournal.com/users/humphrey_clarke/

[Sleigh]

That almost sounds as if it's from personal experience...

[hr]Math, my dear boy, is nothing more than the lesbian sister of biology.

[Prophet Tenebrae]

Impossible - no one could possibly watch late night Trisha without dying.

[quarterstaff]

[s]Prophet Tenebrae wrote on 16:15, 28th Aug 2004:
Impossible - no one could possibly watch late night Trisha without dying.


actuall LOL

[Rufus]

An indispensible don't is: Don't date.

[Wong]

Positive tonight, aren't we?

[hr]No tree has branches so foolish as to fight among themselves

[Pandyboy]

Don't, on the second date, announce your love.

"Ways To Instantly Kill An Erection #17"