i just need to know.....

[Rilla]

[s]Pender Native wrote on 11:57, 26th Nov 2004:
What's an abelian grape? And what happened at the aftermentioned dinner?


An abelian matrix is one which is commutative (hence - commutes) and a grape is purple (a purple commuter).

At the dinner, in a fancy restaurant, the candle falls over and sets the table cloth alight. What to do??

The physicist says, "I know what to do! We must cool down the materials until their temperature is lower than the ignition temperature and then the fire will go out."

The chemist says, "No! No! I know what to do! We must cut off the supply of oxygen so that the fire will go out due to lack of one of the reactants."

While the physicist and chemist debate what course to take, they both are alarmed to see the statistician running around the room starting other fires at other tables. They both scream, "What are you doing?"
To which the statistician replies, "Trying to get an adequate sample size."




[hr]
Anything War can do, Peace can do better

[lúthien]

i found it funny.

[Pender Native]

What's brown and sits on walls?

Humpty Mince

My sense of humour is worse then yours nah ne nah ne nah nah!
[hr]
Yum! Pencils!

[Steveo]

Deary me.

[hr][s]Strangers passing in the street....by chance two seperate glances meet[/s]

[Haunted]

Two atoms were walking donw the road when suddenly one atom stops and panics
"I think I've robbed!" he said "Some of my electrons are missing!"
"My Goodness are you sure?" the other atom replies
"Yeah I'm positive"

[Cain]

[s]Rilla wrote on 12:23, 26th Nov 2004:

At the dinner, in a fancy restaurant, the candle falls over and sets the table cloth alight. What to do??



i found that very funny.

Is there something wrong with me? or is it a sign that I am knowledgeable and sophisticated?

[hr]
It's not who you know, it's who who you know knows

[md25]

Why don't you get mountaineering mosquitoes?

You can't cross a scalar with a vector!

[Pender Native]

Someoen should defineately set up Rilla and md25! There's 2 sausages in a fry pan and goes says 'whew, it's a bit hot in here isn't it?' And the other one goes 'aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! A talking sausage!'


[hr]
Yum! Pencils!

[novium]

[s]Rilla wrote on 12:23, 26th Nov 2004:
[s]Pender Native wrote on 11:57, 26th Nov 2004:[i]
What's an abelian grape? And what happened at the aftermentioned dinner?


An abelian matrix is one which is commutative (hence - commutes) and a grape is purple (a purple commuter).

At the dinner, in a fancy restaurant, the candle falls over and sets the table cloth alight. What to do??

The physicist says, "I know what to do! We must cool down the materials until their temperature is lower than the ignition temperature and then the fire will go out."

The chemist says, "No! No! I know what to do! We must cut off the supply of oxygen so that the fire will go out due to lack of one of the reactants."

While the physicist and chemist debate what course to take, they both are alarmed to see the statistician running around the room starting other fires at other tables. They both scream, "What are you doing?"
To which the statistician replies, "Trying to get an adequate sample size."




[hr]
Anything War can do, Peace can do better
[/i]
Fantastic! I'll have to remember that.


I heard some funny ones about engineers, physicists and something else, but I can't quite remember them.

[novium]

found the email an engineering major friend sent me :

Two engineering students meet on campus one day. The first engineer calls out to the other, "Hey -- Nice bike! Where did you get it?"

"Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young lady rides up on this bike. She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and says 'You can have ANYTHING you want!!'"

"Good choice," says the first, "her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway."


An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog out , smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool!"

An Engineer, a Physicist, and a Mathematician all go to the same Conference. University budgets being what they are, they all stay in the same cheap hotel. Each room has the same floor plan, has the same cheap TV, the same cheap bed, and a small bathroom. Instead of a sprinkler system, the hotel has opted for Fire Buckets. The Engineer, Physicist, and Mathematician are all asleep in bed. At about 2AM, the Physicist wakes up because he smells smoke. He looks in the corner of the room and sees that the TV set is on fire! He dashes into the bathroom, fills the Fire Bucket to overflowing with water, and drenches the TV set. The fire goes out, and the Physicist goes back to sleep. A little while later, the Engineer wakes because he smells smoke. He looks in the corner of his room and sees that the TV set is on fire. He grabs a handy envelope, estimates the BTU output of the fire, scribbles a quick calculation, then dashes into the bathroom and fills the Fire Bucket with just enough water to douse the flames. He puts the fire out and goes back to sleep. In a little while, the Mathematician wakes up to the smell of smoke. He looks in the corner of his room and sees the TV on fire. He looks into the bathroom and sees the Fire Bucket. Having determined that a solution exists, he goes back to sleep.

[md25]

[s]Pender Native wrote on 13:36, 26th Nov 2004:
Someoen should defineately set up Rilla and md25!

unfortunately I'm already attached :-[[[

[Rilla]

[s]md25 wrote on 14:54, 26th Nov 2004: unfortunately I'm already attached :-[[[

if there are ANY hot single straight men in St. Andrews? Because from my latest experiences it really appears not!! Surely the ratio of men to women really cant be that bad?!


I have no idea if that means you are straight or hot - but it proves the point of the original poster I think.

[hr]
Anything War can do, Peace can do better

[bramble]

DEFINATELY proves my point, oh single man where art thou?


[hr]
Never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast

[bramble]

Just been out for another barren friday night, but i ignored the rules somewhat and ended up in the union so i suppose it all my fault really! I did manage to avoid the bop though....
seriously though every guy either had a girl on his arm or looked full of himself, where are the single nice guys hiding, and please tell me where i can go for a decent conversation???

[hr]
Never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast

[otsegolectric]

I was in the Union tonight too, and somehow ended up in the bop...I wonder, it seems that the nice single girls tend to hide themselves pretty well too. I consider myself a nice guy, so whats going wrong?

[Mohawk]

i'm sitting back and waiting for the women to find me, best method,

[bramble]

and i consider myself a nice girl... i even dressed the part tonight!! If u were in the main bar and saw any really tall women with really long hair it was me, if not im still mystery woman...but a nice mystery woman

[hr]
Never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast

[otsegolectric]

well I did see quite a few tall women tonight, since I am a stately 5' 8" (a bit short, i know), but if you see a short guy dressed in black with a ponytail I'd appreciate if you said hello...(I was there tonight in a Deep Purple t-shirt if that may be familiar to you in any way)...

[bramble]

to be honest some of the night was a bit of a blur!! u cant miss me though, im 6ft, taller than even most of the tall girls i know!! plus my bessie mate is like 4ft10 so we make an odd and distinctive pair....!!

[hr]
Never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast

[otsegolectric]

[s]bramble wrote on 03:11, 27th Nov 2004:
to be honest some of the night was a bit of a blur!! u cant miss me though, im 6ft, taller than even most of the tall girls i know!! plus my bessie mate is like 4ft10 so we make an odd and distinctive pair....!!

[hr]
Never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast


oh well then, maybe I should keep my eyes peeled in future...though hopefully at least I've made a point, that us nice guys are around just maybe a wee bit harder to spot than all the over-confident man-sluts who seem to plague a lot of St. Andrews...

[hr]
"The doll's trying to kill me, and the toaster's been laughing at me..."